Crisis of Faith does not have to be a result of a a single event. Originally I wrote this December 14, 2018, and I am bringing it forward because it continues and so many are being hurt. I am watching the same events unfold with a different cast of characters with the same negative influence. Trust me when I say it is hard to tuck that ego aside and let things unfold as Spirit desires. It is easier when you do, as it is with this current situation. It still doesn’t feel all that good.
Here is what I wrote in 2018:
I have recently learned this first hand that it can be a result of a series of events that cause a crisis for someone. There is a situation that I am watching unfold in front of me and I want to fix it. Regrettably it is not mine to fix.
It deeply affects me and my ability to effectively do something that I love to do. It is making me want to walk away because I cannot figure out who is right. Both sides make complete sense and there is truth in both sides. Spirit keeps reminding me that the truth is neither side– that it is somewhere in the middle. Neither side is willing to see that fact. The energy in the place is hostile and full of fear.
This situation is ugly and as it continues it gets worse. It has gotten to the point that I can no longer function in the negativity. I watch as it tears apart people that should be coming together as a community. A community that has a main mission to heal those in need.
I saw this quote “Spiritual death happens one compromise at a time” attributed to Toby Mac and I thought that is exactly what is happening in this particular situation and I am sure you may relate to as well. The crisis of faith that I have is; I don’t want to see it all fall apart. In reality I need to let things play out in order for them to get better. That I have contributed to the situation by making compromise after compromise about what is happening.
When Ego gets in the way
The hard part in all of this for me is my ego. As I watch all of this happen, I somehow believe that I can fix it by staying. Reality is Spirit has something else in mind and I am no longer needed. So it is time for me to let go. We can get comfortable, and it is hard to sometimes move along.
The difficult thing for me is to step away and not feel that I somehow failed. That those that need my assistance will find me and that I will continue to help that in need and provide necessary healing. It is not my place to judge the situation at hand or decide who is right or wrong. Because in the end they both sides are correct, yet neither has acted in the best interest of the community. Which makes them also wrong. If they had, there would not be the conflict. Human Ego causes so many problems.
If you find yourself in a similar situation, trust your heart when it tells you step away and let go. Trust me, Spirit does not like a vacuum, it will be filled by something greater than you can imagine. It is not going to be easy, but the things we need to do the most never really are…