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Setting Boundaries as a Medium: Recognizing and Addressing Client Dependence”

Client dependence is something we should talk about more.  It doesn’t happen often but when it does, it often catches a medium “off guard” and unprepared to assist.  As mediums, we are honored to offer spiritual guidance to those seeking clarity and healing. But there’s a delicate line between offering guidance and enabling dependency. Recognizing when a client is becoming too reliant on mediumship is crucial for their spiritual well-being and for maintaining professional integrity.

The Hidden Dangers of Mediumship Dependence

Clients who rely too frequently on readings can fall into a pattern of avoidance. Rather than dealing with their emotions or personal challenges, they may look to you for answers that they need to find within themselves. This over-reliance can stall their healing, leaving them stuck in a cycle of needing external validation or comfort from Spirit.

As mediums, we must remember that we are guides—not substitutes for personal reflection or therapy. When clients keep coming back too often, it’s essential to recognize that dependency might be forming.

Warning Signs of Client Dependency

Here are some red flags to watch out for:

    • Frequent requests for readings: Clients asking for sessions more than every six months or insisting on immediate follow-ups are signs of potential over-reliance.
    • Emotional distress and urgency: Clients in deep grief or distress may turn to mediumship as an emotional crutch, hoping for answers that they need to process through personal reflection or therapy.
    • Repeated similar questions: If clients consistently seek answers to the same concerns, it may indicate they are not integrating the messages and lessons from previous sessions.

The Importance of Boundaries

Setting clear boundaries is one of the most important aspects of maintaining a healthy practice. As mediums, we must not only protect our energy but also guide our clients toward their own personal growth. Here’s how strong boundaries benefit everyone:

    • For clients: Boundaries encourage them to reflect on the guidance they receive and apply it over time, rather than relying on constant validation.
    • For you: It keeps your practice clear and aligned, preventing burnout and ensuring you attract clients who are ready for spiritual growth rather than dependency.

Guiding Clients Toward Healing

When you notice signs of dependency, it’s essential to handle the situation with care and professionalism. Here’s how to address it:

    • Encourage time between readings: Politely suggest that clients wait at least six months or more between sessions to allow for personal growth and reflection.
    • Refer to professional help: If you feel a client is using mediumship as a substitute for therapy, gently recommend seeking professional emotional support, especially if deep grief or trauma is present. It’s helpful to have a list of trusted therapists or grief counselors for referrals.
    • Help clients understand the difference between mediumship and therapy: Explain that mediumship provides spiritual insights, while therapy provides long-term strategies for emotional healing. Both are important, but they serve different purposes.

The Role of Spirit in Maintaining Boundaries

When we maintain good boundaries with Spirit, the right clients are drawn to us at the right time. Spirit has a way of aligning us with those who need our guidance, but not everyone is meant to receive repeated sessions. Trust that by setting clear limits, you are honoring Spirit’s work and allowing your clients to grow at their own pace.

Empowering Clients Instead of Enabling Dependence

Ultimately, our role as mediums is to empower clients. We must encourage them to develop their inner strength, trust their own intuition, and seek spiritual guidance when it’s truly needed. By doing so, we help them foster a balanced and healthy relationship with mediumship—and with themselves

Being a medium comes with great responsibility. Understanding client dependence and setting boundaries is not about turning clients away but about guiding them toward their own personal and emotional growth. Trust that by honoring these boundaries, both you and your clients will experience deeper, more meaningful spiritual journeys.

Rev. Colleen Irwin
Reverend Colleen Irwin is a Wife, Healer, Psychic Medium, Mentor, Author, and Public Speaker from Rochester, New York, with over 30 years of business experience, including her work as a real estate broker. Colleen’s background in training REALTORS honed her skills in conflict resolution, marketing strategies, and analytical as well as presentation skills, which she now applies to her spiritual education and coaching. Colleen teaches, lectures, and serves Spirit, sharing her lifelong connection with the spiritual world, as captured in her book 'Discovering Your Stream.' She has studied with renowned mediums John White and Lisa Williams and was mentored by Reverend Jack Rudy. Ordained in the Order of Melchizedek by Reverend Dan Chesboro, Colleen is also a PREVIVOR who educates others about the BRCA genetic mutation and taking control of their health. Her mission is to empower women through life’s significant changes—whether it be a career shift, parental care giving, health crises, relationship transformations, or spiritual awakenings. Through spiritual education, inspirational talks, and coaching, Colleen offers guidance and hope, helping women embrace their new purpose.
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