When Students Reject the Teacher Instead of the Lesson

Image of a man at a desk looking inquisitively.

One of the easiest mistakes to make in spiritual development is confusing the teacher with the lesson. Trust me, I have learned this the hard way.

If you don’t like someone’s personality, teaching style, or delivery, it is tempting to dismiss everything they have to say. Unfortunately, that decision can also cause you to miss a lesson you genuinely needed to hear.

I’ve seen students walk away from development circles because they became focused on the teacher instead of the teaching. They stopped listening, not because the information lacked value, but because they had already decided they didn’t like the person presenting it.

That is a costly mistake.

Every Teacher Has Something to Offer

Not every teacher will become your mentor. Some will challenge your patience. Others will stretch your thinking. A few may even demonstrate everything you never want to become.

That doesn’t mean they have nothing to teach you.

Some of my greatest lessons came from teachers I didn’t particularly enjoy. I learned techniques that strengthened my mediumship. I also learned how important kindness, encouragement, and humility are in a classroom. Both lessons were valuable.

Wisdom asks, “What can I learn here?” Ego asks, “Do I like this person?”

Those are two very different questions. Some of the most important things I learned were from teachers I did not like.

Don’t Miss the Lesson

As students, we sometimes expect every teacher to inspire us. Real growth doesn’t always happen that way.

Sometimes the teacher who frustrates you exposes your blind spots. Often the person who challenges you strengthens your discernment. Sometimes the lesson has very little to do with mediumship and everything to do with your own reactions.

You don’t have to admire every teacher. In fact, you don’t have to agree with every opinion. You certainly don’t have to stay in an environment that becomes unhealthy or disrespectful.

But before you reject the teacher, ask yourself whether you are also rejecting a lesson that could help you grow.

The greatest students aren’t the ones who find perfect teachers. They are the ones who recognize that learning can come from almost anyone, if they remain open enough to receive it.

Rev. Colleen Irwin