The Human Experience – Dealing with Conflict

The Human Experience – Dealing with Conflict

So we are all in agreement that we came here for the human experience.    Some parts of this human experience I am not thrilled about.   Ironically, it it is those parts that I am learning so much from.   We all have free will, we can either do what is right or not.

Conflicts seem to be my largest hurdle right now.    Conflicts in personalities, and actions not matching the words many Spiritualists speak.  Before you think that I am getting on a high horse, know that I am reflecting on my own behavior and working to ensure that my words and actions match.  Something that I will admit are very difficult to do.   I am a work in process, flawed at best.

Like many times before when I find something that I have difficulty grasping with, I turn to the three words that I selected for the year.   The year 2017 has been about Forgiveness, Trust and Love.   I also see 2016 words coming back into focus Patience, Steadfast and Genuine.   Truth be told 2015 words of Fearless, Compassion and Persistent apply to this as well.    Nine words that can sum up my dealing with conflicts.

Conflicts in words  used and actions taken are what bothers me the most right now.   There is a lesson that needs to be learned and it is a big one.    In the Spirit World there is not judgement, just understanding.   Yet as humans we judge people all the time.    We hold them up to a standard and perhaps unfairly.    Often it is because the decisions that they make impact us negatively or they cause us more work.   Or they are “getting away” with something that we have been called on the carpet for.

Perhaps they have offended us inadvertently and have no clue the hurt they have caused.   There is anger that is built up over time that develops into hate for that person.   I see it time and again.   I am guilty of such behavior.    Instead of having a difficult conversation we skirt around it and let the negativity build up.

Earlier this week something blew up on a person on Facebook.   I shared it with a couple of friends and then realized I needed to think deeply about why I shared it.   It resulted in my decision to unlike a business page, and unfriend a few people.   I was only following to watch the drama as a bystander.   What happens to that person is their own Karma and I have sat in judgement of this person for too long.  They offended me in the past I was holding onto that anger.    I wanted a front row seat but guess what?    It was driving me crazy.   I was getting upset and worrying about something that does not concern me.   Meanwhile ignoring things that I needed to accomplish.

Another situation has someone trying to pull me in the middle of their drama with another person.   I could stand on my moral high ground, but I have chosen to be neutral in the situation.   I see the judgement and the hurt and anger from the one person.   I also can see the other side to the story and the truth that lies in the middle.   I thought that I should bridge the divide between the two parties.   I care for each a lot.

What I realize and understand is that life is not always black and white.   There are many shades of gray in the middle.   I have had conversations with a few people on the best way to handle the situation.    None of us had a clear cut answer.   All of us are giving it up to a higher power.   Either illuminate us with what to do, or send in Divine intervention.

The human experience is not easy.   It is messy and complicated with lots of moving parts.   Not everyone is as enlightened or willing to do the hard work that they need to do.  It is not our job to force them to do so either.   We as humans, must let others do what they do.   Learn to not take it personally and trust that the right things will happen along the way.

Forgiveness is a gift I give myself.   I have had some genuine emotions to deal with this week.   I have found the patience needed to work through them.   This is not a quick fix thing in my life, this is something that I will have to be persistent in keeping my judgement of others at bay.    I have been fearless in my willingness to admit my failings and have found compassion in several instances in my life.   I must be steadfast in my trust that the Universe has this and that by being loving and compassionate all will be as it needs to be.

I hope this helps you in your human experience.

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Rev. Colleen Kulikowski