Observing Conflicts – The truth in two sides to every story

Observing Conflicts – The truth in two sides to every story

In the past few weeks I have been observing conflicts.   Spirit for one reason or another has felt it necessary for me to see this and make some sense of it for myself.   I have had personal conflicts myself and I have been an outsider observing in several other conflicts.

The observing conflicts of others I am better understanding my own conflicts.   Or at least finding a way through them with a little more compassion and understanding than I have ever had before.

Understanding Personalities when Observing Conflicts

I have seen a wide variety of personalities the last few weeks in many conflicts that are occurring around me.

  • There are those that will pile on with the popular thought without giving thought for themselves.
  • Some are full of self riotous indignation and feel that the world owes them what they have not earned
  • Many people just are oblivious to how their actions may affect others and they go blindly through life not understanding that their actions create reactions in others.
  • There are those people who are highly sensitive, and take everything personally.   Want to joke around and then when they are offended will cry foul and complain loudly.
  • Some walk the earth as if their are entitled to everything the way they want it and when they want it.
  • There are many that have been so beaten down that they don’t have the strength within to stand up for what is right.
  • Then there is the group of people that create conflicts as a sport for their personal entertainment or to advance their own personal agenda.

We all know people that fit these descriptions and we have seen conflicts play out in the process.    This week I have watched a couple of conflicts play out and they are painful to watch.   The individual conflicts are not important.  What is important is that I see that conflict from both sides and I see the truth of the situation.   I see the dangers of taking sides in a situation and the absolute necessity to do so in others.

Observing Conflicts – The middle ground

In every conflict there is a Story A and  B and then there is the truth.    Often it is not the topic that has exploded but a series of events that explode out of control.   One party is left pissed off the other dazed and confused.   Many times there has been a creation of two camps passionate about one side or another.   There is no fairness in the situation and those around are left shaking their heads wondering how to fix the situation they are left to deal with.   Because when a great rift happens there is fall out and it creates a wave of negativity that cannot be avoided.

What if it didn’t have to be that way?  Social Media has not been very social; in fact it has made real life interactions less and we have gotten away from really talking with each other.   It has morphed into a series of likes and posting memes.    Facebook for me has been a series of auto tweets of inspirational quotes because each and every time I go on there I can’t deal with the arguments over stupid stuff.

Slow down a bit the next time you are in a conflict.   Take a moment to understand the other side.   See if you can find the truth in the middle.  I am not saying that every time you may be wrong — you may be 100% right in the conflict.   But if you take that moment to see the other side you may find a better resolution.  How you ask?  Because you can find compassion and understanding.    Right now the world needs more of that.

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Rev. Colleen Kulikowski